Vornews

 OK, Harry, here's the beef. In two months' time, you'll be standing in front of hundreds of people, faced with a notoriously nerve-wracking bit of public speaking. For mere mortals, the best man's speech is bad enough. For you, it's unimaginably terrifying. You've got to be touching but witty, confident but humble. You've got to tease your brother but flatter him at the same time. And all this in front of some of the most famous and powerful people on the planet. For someone more prone to gaffs than most of us, it's one heck of a challenge.

Luckily, Great Speech Writing has much   vornews  experience in the art of getting it right.

Here are some top speech tips to spare the royal blushes:

- Pace yourself. This is Buckingham Palace, not Mahiki, You need a clear head rather than Dutch courage.

- Give any costumes a wide berth, particularly anything featuring army uniforms or black face paint.

- Ignore advice from certain well-meaning friends. They haven't got it right in the past and they won't come to your rescue now.

- Avoid referring to the bride and groom by any tabloid nicknames - eg Waity Katy.

- Don't mention 'doors to manual'. In fact, avoid talking about air travel altogether to be on the safe side.

- Try not to mention the couple's 'break'. However harmless the joke sounds to you, it will almost certainly result in glares - and possibly tears - from the bride.

- Keep it short. This way, there is far less room for error.

- Don't forget to thank everyone who needs thanking, particularly the Queen - but don't call her Granny!